No, an LDR is not some new train service based in London. It stands for ‘Long Distance Relationship,’ something much more common than a punctual train nowadays.
From TV to film, and even in contemporary video games, relationships are thrust upon us like our dads old suit at our first family wedding. However something that doesn’t get as much airtime is the idea of long-distance relationships. Even though a significant amount of students start their uni life in a long-distance relationship. Whether they are in a different town, county or country to their partner, it’s still incredibly hard to maintain.
How will you cope having to wait three months before seeing your significant other again? Yes, we live in a time where Skype and Facetime are the keys to eternal face2face communication. In business, these platforms are perfectly acceptable, as they allow information and insight to be shared. However when you’re trying to uphold a fairly new relationship over a three month period of separation, insight and information don’t really help a lot. It’s certainly not the same as walking down the corridor to their room or taking a cab to their house whenever you want to see them.
“It’s the emotional connection that you’ve developed with that person that you miss the most, the security you have with them. Those are the moments, the memories, that couples in long-distance relationships long for – the ones most others take for granted.” – Anon student speaking about their LDR
How to survive LDR’s:
The stress of being apart is immense. Those romantic phone calls you envisaged can suddenly become tense, with long silences peppered with loaded sentences.
“The most important thing for you to do is to try to take a step back. Hold your tongue and count to ten before responding. Try to consider everything that has affected you in your day, good or bad, minute or massive. Everything you’ve encountered that day will have had some kind of effect on your mood. Similarly things will have happened to your partner during their day.”
Not having the one person around you that cheers you up most is a very difficult thing to come to terms with. So when you do get a chance to communicate with them, try and enjoy it. Consider everything you’ve dealt with that day and use it as a reminder to check if your other half is ok. Because a lot of the time people who are actually in LDR’s, regardless of who they have around them and the support they have, can end up feeling extremely isolated…
And if you yourself are feeling that way then there’s a good chance that your significant other is feeling the same way too. So confide in them, use one another as an avenue of escape. Even though you can’t physically be near one another, you can stay connected – don’t waste those precious phone calls or video chats, banish the awkward silences and instead simply try to make each other smile.
“In doing so you’ll feel less isolated, and so much happier in yourself because you’ll know that you’ve cheered up your other half. Making them smile, and ensuring they feel loved and supported, is the most important thing about a long distance relationship.”